Dumbo’s Law
Wherein our hero finds a way to hit it big both financially and intellectually.
I woke up in the middle of the nighjt and shouted EUREKA!!!! (which is short hand for “I am now in th present state that results from a previous moment of finding,” as I had learned in my beginning Necromancy course. Perfect! I shouted EUREKA again real loud, so the grumpy people in the adjoining garret would not complain that they had missed this historic moment and the opportunity to rejoice with me in a discovery that could change my life, solve my financial problems, and make America great again.
Here’s the scoop. I had found the bright side of the dismal fact reported in the last blog entry that all the smart people, and some of the not-so-smart ones, like me, thought that Tr*mp was a populist nota demagogue. I realized in my dreams that the odds-makers in Las Vegas were probably offering high odds on this very matter. If so, all I had to do was put some money on the line and prove that demagogue was the right word. And Zombie would help me with that!
I stumbled on the pile of dirty laundry on my way to the second-hand IBM CPU that my parents had given me fifteen years ago when I was applying to college. Slow, but a real workhorse. Once it came up I wouldcheck to see what odds Las Vegas was offering.
While the CPU was booting up I turned my attention to another part of my new business plan – capital formation, maybe through an IPO or if necessary a bank robbery. Then in another dazzling insight I realized the funds might be nearer to hand, so started groping in the cracks and crevices of the old sofa that had served me so well on so many occasions. I was disappointed at first, finding only half a granola bar, a meaningless telephone number scribb;ed on the bac of a movie ticket, a moth-eaten ski cap, and a few pennies, dimes and two quarters. But then, way down deep I felt a lump, skillfully extricated it and found –yes! – the wallet I had lost a year and a half ago. I opened it as fast as I could and found two fives and six one dollar bills. Two mysteries solved – The wallet must have slipped out when I was making our on the couch - the only such time in recorded history. And the mystery of capital formation was solved as well. The odds, I now saw on the screen, were 25 to 1. All I had to do was prove Trr*mp was a demagogue and I woud have enough to buy an iPad. That would increase my productivity as a soon-to-be-acclaimed writer and set me on the path to fame and fortune.
I generalized this insight into a law that may be applied both to financial and to intellectual matters. With all due modesty named it after myself: Dumbo’s Law: Always go for he high odds; what have you got to lose?
You ask why go for the long odds rather than playing it safe? Not just because the pay off is bigger , but because you get at the really interesting questions that way. Any dumbo knows that!
Now all I have to do is find an elegant and convincing proof that Tr*mp is not a populist. He is a demagogue. I’ll get right to work. The laundry can wait.
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May 2017
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